____xX LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM AND NOT FOR WHO I WAS..COS NOW IM WASTED.. Xx____
~`♥ AzaleA's Pr0fiLe
AzaleA...a flower
27
So Attached..
Not Lookin..
but Always Courted and Lusted..
Pretty,sweet,tactful...
~`♥ AzaleA LiKeS
foods music company hearing the strums of the guitar criticising ( but i dun lack praisal though)
the moon,the sun,the sky trees,unique leaves,the smell of the rain...and yea..the clapping sound of the thunder
~`♥ AzaleA HaTeS
how the time moves so fast
cockroaches
bad odour
~`♥ AzaleA WiShEs
new hp
new mp3
lots of money
to know the future..
to know in what state will i end my life...
i think my daughter needs help..but what is really wrong wif her?
I dunno how to put this, to believe or not to believe. Eversince she was a kid, she always has this 'seventh-sense' to feel, to sense, to see or hear the 'other side of the world'. I remembered when she was 4, she ran out of her room and tell me that a boy was sitting at the computer table. There were other many incidents though, but i'd rather not write it now cos its erm..2 am..and i'm kinda alone...
anyway...
Tonight she felt exactly it and told me she wanted to sleep in my room. Of course i was a little agitated, anxious and a lil afraid.
I remembered, she was once brought to a malay makcik urut' by Nenek Moyang (my buddy,Mawar nyer nenek la tu..) when she kept crying non-stop due to fever. Was it my folly to main ikut je., i dunno la sey..but this nenek urut was a lil weird cos she is well-known to cure people by stepping on their bodies, beat them up hard and twist their muscles.
And now i wondered why the heck did i bring my baby to see her . I remembered vividly how that Makcik urut grimaced in pain when she touched my baby Putri. She screamed " ouch, sakit!" when she touch Putri's hand. "Ouch sakit!" when she held my daughter's body. I remembered, Putri, who was 6 or 7 months old at that tym did not even wanna look at her face when she finished that 'berubat'. Menyesal tak sudah for bringing her to see her..cos its a waste or tym and money. and things could turn ugly in the future. Like now. ..
Okay, i'm not blaming that tukang urut for her special sense of the 'alam
ghaib'..but..but...haiz...
Back to my daughter's state of mind, tonight she was really down and told me more incidents she had kept bottled in her mind for soooo long. She told me she still sees it many times. Be it in school, at home, in the streets..I asked her why only NOW she confided in me. In between tears, she told me she wasnt ready. and was afraid 'that thing' might hear her..or harm her. She was really stressed out i let her cry in my arms. She would cover her ears and tell me to keep quiet few times, before continuing her story, some parts in whispers, some parts in rage, some parts in madness. Was it stress? Really, i actually felt a lil afraid when she did dat, but i had to be brave and explain to her that Allah is the only ONE she has to fear.
But, what else can i do to help?
Now she is sound asleep on my bed....goodnight kiss to yu my dear Putri..
Goodnight kiss in your nightgown Lavender in your bed So innocent as you lie down Sweet dreams that run through your head
Are you lonely without Mommy's love? I want you to know I'd die for that moment You're just a poor girl Afraid of this cruel world Taken away from it all...
