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Tuesday, May 29, 2007



Taken Date : 20/05/2007








Sighs...

Mohamed Nashrullah@Asyrory has been warded since Thursday. Initially it was due to jaundice.. reading taken dat tym wat a 365. According to them, the safe reading for jaundice level for a newborn baby 4 days old is 200. The wait was hell.. the nurses and docs was explaining the same old thing ...dari polyclinic, sampai ke A&E..sampai ke ward..they've been explaining the same old thing. You know how the O blood group wen mix with the AB group will fuse out this jaundice bla bla bla... ended up the wasted precious tym to do the fototheraphy thing on my baby. DAt was the worst waiting day in my history. Dah la dalam hari, first, wait at the poly to test darah to check jaundice. Then Wait at the A&E.. then WAIT for doc to see baby. WAIT for baby to push to ward. MIND YOU the WAIT tu bukan minutes tau.. berejam ar..!! okayla.. maybe paling kejap is like 45 minutes? ha.. idiot kan? We have to WAIT so long for the machine.

It was a sad sight..cos i cant feed him, or carry him wen he cried during the procedure. I broke down. He had his eyes covered..his feet and hands pricked...haiz...kecik2 kena poke sana poke sini..
Just look at that. (see left Taken Date 24/05/2007) Naked, blue, hungry, blindfolded..such a heart wrenching sight..
So while he was on that, we registered his name..and yea..u guessed it..WAIT again...
The worst wait was waiting for the results. And despite the phototheraphy, his jaundice level increased again. From 395 to 410! We had to make a big decision of letting him do a blood transfusion. Which of cos had lots of risk. The risk of infection, risk or pottassium, calcium inbalance..and many other complications, including death. It was really the worst day of my life. I was crying a lot, my mind was really unstable, it really felt like i'm gonna lose my baby. Alhamdulillah..kudos to Dr Ng and Dr Simon, my baby underwent the blood transfusion and righht now his jaundice level is a safe 138. BUT, he got a slight fever pulak..! So, kena check lagi blood dia.. and true enough, after testing his FBC, his blood platelets ade problems lak. His white blood cells are higher, so they have to inject in antibiotics for 5 days. Bother!!!!! So currently ive been to and from the hospital just for him..sehari tak tgk dia..its very painful..sakit di hati, di jiwa, mata, dan buah dada ku...

I MISS MY BABY!!! Pray he will be back home safe and sound.. as soon as possible...


(Picture taken while breastfeeding at the hospital.. Taken Date 25/05/2007)










(Picture taken bila disuntik antibiotics..Taken Date 26/05/2007 in hospital)


~ { 10:47 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Wednesday, May 23, 2007



Alhamdulillah i bursted the balloon 5 days before the actual time (20TH MAY 2007) and lemme tell ya its the most painful one ever experienced! But syukur Alhamdulillah all is well, baby is fine, and the best part is i have my loved ones by my side in time of labour.

Felt a sharp pain at about 3 am dat morning, but was too tired to wake up cos i was sedated, thks to panadol flu, cos i was having a fever. I woke up at 4 to pee and realise, omigosh! BLOOD! I was frantic cos there is no movement whatsoever in me and i tot im gonna lost the baby! Immediately smsed Sham to hurry home, while i clean the kitchen..yes, practically trying to make everything loooks spick and span cos i dunwanna leave da house in utter madness while im gone, say if i would deliver.

Upon reaching, doc told me its 3cm..and i can choose to go home, or stay. I chose home, cos i havent wash the piling dirty laundry in the toilet.. so , we headed back home at 7.30am. The contraction was just like half hour interval so its not dat bad. So i managed to clear the laundry, despite the contractions. Until its started to contract 5 mins. I felt it was time to go back to the hospital. ( DID I TELL YA THE NURSES THERE GAVE ME A ONE WEEK APPOINTMENT DESPITE THE BLOOD AND THE MINOR CONTRACTIONS AS WELL AS ITS 3 cm torn WIDE OPEN????...) We reached there at 11.. and the baby finally popped out at 3.02pm! Phew,,wat a relieve! After the delivery, the nurse took hell of a long time to stitch (due to inexperience) and i was shivering like hell inside. Its just not me to survive in cold rooms, and i was half naked there in a fully airconditioned room. I was in a fit, trembling, shivering from head to toe, for hours and uttering nonsense, Sham tot i was gonna die. The nurse ( according to Sham ) was frantically trying to hard to make me come to, but i was too damn cold. I tot it hit the brain a lil, haha cos i dunno wats goin on ard me for a while. ( Lucky tak keras or biol sey..) i say its a minor bentan ar..

Other than dat experience, and the intense exceptionally painful labour dis tym, it was the best moment wen i hold the baby for the first time, again, after 5 yrs. Sweet moment.. which will last for eternity, only mums could ever experience!


Sape name ni? belum sure lagi la... haiz...

DATE OF BIRTH : 20052007


~ { 4:46 PM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Thursday, May 17, 2007


AMARAN: Separuh Perenggan Pertama Dan Kedua Penyertaan Blog Untuk Hari Ini Dalam Penggunaan Bahasa Melayu

Saya akan cuba menyertakan blog dalam bahasa melayu pada perenggan satu dan dua untuk kali ini.

Cemburu bila saya melihat personaliti Tv, seperti pembaca berita ataupun deejay radio yang diwawancara secara tidak rasmi berbual dalam bahasa melayu dengan lancar. Saya sendiri terpaksa membuka satu lagu tetingkap, (Free English-Malay Online Dictionary) khusus untuk saya rujuk buat perenggan ini. Jadi, saya rasa saya tidak mungkin dapat bertutur dengan selancar dan se'melayu' begini apabila diwawancara atau berkata2 sekalipun. Saya rasa akan menjadi pencapaian yang hebat yang boleh saya banggakan jika saya dapat bertutur sebegini baik (ha..ha.. tanpa membawa kamus bergerak atau menyelit kata-kata yang dipinjam secara langsung dari perkataan Inggeris.)

Pada waktu ini, saya terpaksa bersengkang mata menulis blog sambil mendengar alunan gitar petikkan Paul Gilbert, untuk mengelakkan mata saya dari terpejam untuk memastikan suhu badan Zulhilmi tidak mencecah 39 atau 40. Yalah, kerana saya tidak sempat tidur semalamam melayankan kerenahnya berbual2 dalam keadaan rayan (cey cey.. perkataan melayu yang baru saya pelajari, selain dari halusinasi..). Semalam sahaja jam 3.30 pagi, suhunya naik ke 39.9 darjah celsius. Dan pagi ini pula naik 40.1 darjah celsius. Saya ingat setelah dia makan ubat dan tidur, suhu nya akan turun. Sangkaan meleset apabila saya mendapatinya dalam posisi yang sangat aneh, mata terbeliak2, tangan kejang2 dan mulut menggumam, terkumat kamit, seperti terkena sawan,sama seperti yang telah dilaluinya pada umur 3 tahun. Perasaan cemas hanya Allah yang tahu, lalu saya terus berbual2 dengannya sambil memujuknya bangun. Saya harus memandikannya perlahan2 menggunakan air suam2 supaya suhu badannya tidak terlalu panas. Kelihatan lehernya keras memandang ke atas, jadi saya harus berhati2.

Phew..macam kertas karangan untuk dihantar ke cikgu lagaknya..MUAHAHAHAHAHA...

It's not easy writing it all in Malay and i think if really my blog is in full good Malay, macam baca suratkhabar kan? Or even worst , macam ujian peperiksaan Karangan! But, reading it alll again, macam satu kepuasan. Bukan lah nak menunjuk2 yang kita ni pelat nak ckp melayu or malu nak berbahasa Melayu fasih, but memang hakikatnya Im not gud in it! And im ashamed of it. Melayu tapi tak cakap melayu. Teruk kan...And i have to buck up. Nowadays, im like speaking gud Malay to Zul and Syasya. One time tu, i told Zul, " Rancangan kegemaran Zul akan bermula tidak lama lagi...bangun lah.." and he was like .." Apa tu? Cakap melayu betul2 la!!..Iim tak paham..!!" Sighs...

Back to Zul's condition, i guess its 80% perentage that he can't go to the School Excursion tomorrow to the Zoo with his friends..Poor thing! Its not much about the money, ( I mean yes, we paid 16 bucks alredy and of cos memang la rugi) but mainly cos, he was really counting the days to the excursion. I feel sorry for him. I hope he could make it by tomorrow, but looking at his condition today, it looks pretty bad. Anyhow, i'll just pray that he will get well soon.

As I am musically inclined, i listen to all kinds of music. Be it hip hop, R&B, a lil bit of dangdut, pop ethnic, punk rock.. i have many different kinds of mode. But truly at the end of every mode i'm in, the saviour and the best mode that lasts will always be the guitar strums mode...

~ { 10:34 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Saturday, May 12, 2007














SEMPENA HARI IBU..


Khas buat ibu tersayang...HJH SALBIAH BTE LAWI..hayatilah lagu di blog ni...

Dia Ibuku
M.Nasir & Yunizar (1981)

Dari fajar hingga senja
Siang Malam diharungnya

Lumpur sawah duri malam
Arus takdir hidup

Tak sedikit dikesalnya
Segalanya untuk kami

Oh! ibuku yang tersayang
Demi kasih ibu

Tak diharapnya balasan
Cuma bahagialah kami

Agar nanti jangan ulangi

Jalanan hidup penuh duri

Tak ternilaikan budinya
Berkorban jiwa raga

Bagai dewi luhur hatinya

Kasih dialah ibuku penuh

~ { 2:35 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;



okay.... i havent watch Cicak Man..but tgk trailer..like okay-okay..even if ratings said otherwise. And then there is this Jangan Pandang Belakang..yang digembar gemburkan, but wen i watched it at home i can see the animation of the hantu not really convincing.( Oh well, maybe its cos i watched it at my aunt's and dat cd is not ori..so tak la seram like it was widely spread..)

HA....!!

Promoting cerita yang worth watching...AKAN DATANG... its like GhostBuster, but much much better... Great animation, great skills in the making..kudos to ImageBox Sdn Bhd and the crew.. they did a great job, i think better than Cicak Man..or even SpiderMan 1..hehe

check it out!! Click da link below!

Antoofighter Unofficial Teaser Trailer

Oleh Rozdan Mazalan

Penghasilan filem animasi bukan mudah kerana dalam satu saat 24 frame gambar diberi kesan visual

PENGORBANAN dan kesungguhan untuk menghasilkan sesuatu yang berkualiti sering kali terlepas pandang sesetengah pihak yang leka dengan keasyikan dan keseronokan apa saja yang disajikan di depan mata.

Sekiranya yang disajikan itu agak kurang memuaskan, tahu pula kepada siapa yang harus mereka menuding jari untuk mengumpat keji yang dihasilkan itu tidak seperti yang mereka harapkan.

Namun bukanlah kerja renyah bagi tenaga kerja yang terpaksa bersengkang mata 14 jam sehari untuk memberi gambaran realistik kepada penonton hasil kerja dalam bentuk animasi untuk diterjemahkan dalam bentuk filem.

Tentu kita tidak perasan, sekali imbas hasil kerja animasi yang dihasilkan selama ini menerusi kaca televisyen nampak seakan mudah. Hakikatnya Imagebox Sdn Bhd yang bakal menerbitkan filem pertamanya dengan kerjasama Grand Brilliance Sdn Bhd (GBSB) dipertanggungjawab untuk merealisasikan lebih 70 peratus animasi ke dalam filem terbaru berjudul Antoo Fighter.

Filem yang memuatkan 600 teknik imej janaan komputer tiga dimensi (3D CGI) dan kesan visual khas sekali gus menjadi filem terbanyak yang menggunakan teknik itu di negara ini selepas filem arahan Yusry Abdul Halim berjudul Cicak-Man.

Pengarah Kesan Visual Imagebox Sdn Bhd, Asrulhisyam Ahmad (Black)

berkata, pembikinan kesan visual untuk filem itu adalah satu kerja yang mencabar bagi lapan tenaga kerja yang hanya diberikan tujuh bulan saja untuk menyiapkannya.

“Kerja menambahkan kesan visual atau animasi untuk filem ini bermula sebelum filem itu melakukan penggambaran. Ia akan melalui empat peringkat sebelum dapat digambarkan ke dalam bentuk filem.

“Bermula peringkat pertama, kerja perbincangan bersama pengarah filem untuk kerja merancang dan mengukur model yang bakal dilengkapkan untuk kesan visual atau sudut gerakan kamera supaya kerja memasukkan kesan visual tidak mendatangkan masalah.

“Di sini saya harus berada di sepanjang lokasi penggambaran selama mana ia berjalan, untuk filem ini yang mengambil masa selama 45 hari bersama krew dan pelakon yang terbabit.

“Peringkat kedua berjalan selepas proses penggambaran berakhir di mana kerja suntingan dan menyusun gambar mengikut jalan cerita yang dimahukan pengarah. Proses diteruskan dengan menukar resolusi tinggi untuk gambar mengikut format yang dimahukan untuk sebuah filem iaitu HDVT 1080 dengan skala 1920x1080.

“Peringkat ketiga adalah yang paling mencabar bagi tenaga kerja animasi yang memerlukan tumpuan sepenuhnya untuk mendapatkan hasil kerja animasi yang berkualiti. Di sini kerja seperti proses pewarnaan digital dan mattle, mengubah visual, model 3D, animasi 3D dan pergerakan imej dalam filem menjadi kerja yang paling rumit.

“Lebih merumitkan untuk proses mengubah visual dan balasan 3D ini sehingga mengambil masa selama empat hari bagi satu ‘shoot’ yang akan ditayangkan selama empat saat saja di layar perak. Dalam satu saat itu terkandung 24 frame gambar yang harus diberi kesan visualnya.

“Bayangkan sekiranya 110 babak yang dijangkakan lebih satu jam 30 minit durasi untuk filem ini harus diselitkan kesan visualnya, berapa lama masa yang diperlukan untuk menyiapkan filem animasi ini? Tidak hairanlah sekiranya di Barat mereka terpaksa mengambil masa beberapa tahun untuk menyiapkan sebuah filem animasi seperti Lord Of The Rings, 300, Star Wars, Spiderman dan sebagainya.

“Bagi peringkat terakhir pula, segala kerja yang sudah dimasukkan kesan visualnya akan dipindahkan semula ke bahagian suntingan seperti pada peringkat pertama itu, di sini proses memasukkan CGI dan visual yang sudah dikemaskini ke dalam data sebelum dihantar untuk dijadikan filem yang sempurna,” katanya yang berpengalaman lebih 12 tahun dalam bidang animasi.

Imagebox Sdn Bhd yang mempunyai lapan tenaga kerja animasi Bumiputera semuanya turut memasang objektif untuk melahirkan tenaga mahir di kalangan Bumiputera agar dapat menandingi tenaga kerja dari negara Barat.

“Apa yang saya nampak, negara kita ini mempunyai ramai generasi baru yang berminat untuk menguasai bidang animasi ini dan kualiti yang ditunjukkan setanding Barat. Cuma mereka ini tidak diberi peluang untuk terus berkarya dengan lebih sempurna,” katanya yang sudah lebih enam tahun bersama syarikat itu sejak mula beroperasi.

SERAM: Awie memegang
watak sebagai Drakulat
selepas proses peringkat
ketiga iaitu mengubah
visual dan balasan 3D.

~ { 12:47 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Friday, May 11, 2007


<super bingit mode>counting the days berapa hari dia nak diam..

So, i need to whine, and blabber, and mencarut here.

Okay, found out there is gonna be a new singing competition, LIVE YOUR DREAMS, for older wannabes in Singapore soon. Yang aged 25 years and above, sila dengan tak malunyer, masok la.. Dengar2 from satu celebrity source yang bole dipercayai, dis competition is like a karaoke kinda thing. But whatever it is, its like, duh..wat else is new in media? Dah bersepah sey penyanyi in Singapore.And of cos all over the world. Be it on chinese channel, indian, ang moh, mesti ade reality show, undian based on sms singers. And then the hype for that instant glam.Sheesh...its geting annoying. And the meluat part is wen they got kicked off, and they will exit with tears and hugs, like the world is ending... yang dah menang pulak terus ilang je..or else, just will, u know, sing lagu.." ku menanti..dan menanti, dan menanti,..hingga kini, hanya ada satu cd..sampai mati..." wahahahaha..
no offence la.. kan SUPER BINGIT mode, so, am in the mood to kutuk and mengutuk all i want arrr..!! TAk suke baca, go and belah la..Oh yea..not forgetting the judges..mesti comment on the spot. And sure ade satu yang suke kutuk..aler..it all starts from American Idol sey.. dah lama tak nmpk judges yang senyap, tunduk tulis notes je after each singer sings..Lmfao...now its criticising in the open. Oh yea.. and the bloopers, the teruk singers yang over confident, ( u know, dat always happens before the top 10 ke..) mesti ade the kuraps2 yang tak malu...showing their talents, pas tu nangis2 bila tak dpt masok..) geessh...

Tapi kan, even if nak semarakkan dunia seni ni kan..( i mean wat else kan other than 'singing' ) they shud do a competition like junior jams gitu. So cool kan? Best part is, grup must consist of guitarist, bassist, vocalist, drummer.. wah mesti gerek..and then the judges can judge on da individual pemain as well.. (eh macam superband ke? no la... dis one better sket...kena pakai seluar ketat, rambut panjang, then main lagu kapak..lmfao..ok per..hidup rok dulu2 kah kah kah...!
watever..)

Bole ar..first week buat lagu rok kapak..so gitarist can show their skills menggentel gitar..(fuyooss).. second week, buat lagu punk..3rd week lagu hard core, then thrash.. lagu metal.. ok wat.. byk bole buat..abeh nak pop, hip hop je ke..mana eysai... bingit!!! bingit!!! bingit...!!

And then must be strictly for men je..no women allowed.. kwang kwang kwang... turned off la kalau ade women dalam band..lmfao. Kalau nak masok and if nasib la termenang pon, sure kalau buat konsert takde org turun..huhuhu... to me the only woman grup dat rules is Feminine..lol..

PS:Oh ya..dis tym nyer budak2 Anugerah mendaak sey..so kaku, lemau and terrible.. and the BEST part is, the judges byk puji2 sey.."ur falsetto is very gud.." or "i like ur style.." eww.. judges sume kayu tak leh pakai ar... Yang kira okay tu..joget pulak mcm robot... kwang kwang kwang.... takpe la..kalau menang pon tak kemana...unless ur nasib very the baik, u got wat it takes (selalunyer bukan yang menang la kan..) be prepared to hijrah ke negara seberang tambak je la...huhuhu..ok la tu dari takde, kan kan kan..

fed up!!! fed up!!! fed up!!!... im sooooo bloooooody miserable..!!!!!!!!!!!!! for the infinityth time(cey ade ke word tu..) i wish i cud turn back time sey....arrrghhhh...!!! i wish i dun even know u , i dun even see u , i dun even have to have anything to do wif u!!! cos u dun care anymore, and if dats how u feel, i'm beginning to feel da same!

~ { 12:26 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Thursday, May 10, 2007


so since i'm super bengang i decide to take a break by listening to punk ska pops screaming to the old tunes like ...

I Will Survive
Wannabe
Ill Be There
Hello
Pink Panther Theme
Tomorrow
Barbie Girl
Wild World
Sesame Street
I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing
So Happy Together
Phantom Of The Opera

I still prefer Ramones though..but still nice to my ears ar these fast tracks...

~ { 2:32 PM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;



sighs..

i dun feel like eating..i dun feel like eating breakfast, lunch.. i'l just live on munching ice. I know its not healthy, especially in my condition, but takde mood langsung nak makan. Just terfikir pasal how stoopid i was to start it all.

I used to be a rebel, but nowadays like so lembik sey, im disgusted at myself! I stooped so low and telan evrything..and i did just dat becos of da kids. sighs..wonder if its a gud thing..but its gota be.

Watever..its killing me inside. Its frustrating to be a goody2.Its stressful to be a role model, i feel like turning the clock and start all over. I dunwanna lead anymore, its grr..oh dear, like a burden. I know its hard, to always show and set gud examples.. but Allah has gave me these responsibilities..i cant just give it up can I? sooner or later they'll know i was never an angel.. sighs.. sighs..sighs... no its not sighs.. its AAAAAAAAAAAAARRGHHHHHH...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
stressnyer aku!!!!

~ { 12:46 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Thursday, May 03, 2007


SANTAI MOOD TODAY...

Layang lagu biol ni...

CINTA SAMBAL BELACAN
YUSRY KRU & APEK SAIFUL
(dipetik dari cerita LADY BOSS)

Cinta itu boleh diumpamakan bagai makan sambal belacan

Walau pedas hingga mengalir air mata masih mau dimakan jua

Cinta jangan dibuat macam goreng pisang

Sungguh enak bila makan panas2

Bila ia sejuk jadi kurang enak

Hohoho.. hilang sedapnya

~ { 2:38 PM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;



Alhamdulillah.. Mak and Abah dah selamat pulang ke pangkuan keluarga after their 'honeymoon' hehe.. well, there were hiccups before their trip and while on their trip, things happen in here..but..i rather not talk about it AT ALL.

To Azah..i hope u dun pick up that 'habit' of coverin up ur shit like 'u knowwho'..i hope u know the difference between the gud and bad. Indirectly she is teaching u some new skills..but erm..take heed, i won't tolerate it if it comes from u in the future, aite. AND IT BETTER BE THE LAST TIME...!!! (like she promise!)

You are not a pauto queen... u just did wat has to be done.

Anyhow..as of today, i'd like to wash my hands of her case, ( uh well, its gonna be quite impossible) but i guess slowly but surely. At least for the best? Well, just cant tolerate her being so selfish, self centered, irresponsible attitude. So good at manupulating people..only Allah knows what's in her mind...


~ { 1:05 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;


Wednesday, May 02, 2007


phew..got back my old skin.. and dah tak jadi kapak lagi dah.. byk nak tulis but..save it for tomorrow..rite now im hungry but malas nak carik makan.. and am tired....

~ { 1:23 AM }
vintage.. classical beauty..;